CarnEvil
Thursday, April 30, 2009
tossed card
it comes to him part by part
a little faded
her smile,eyes,voice, and hair
he knows she's doesn't care
he was not the one
he was not rich
i remember how he felt
every time he saw her
wide smiles
aching body
buzz in heart
he got addicted
she was a drug
she got him high
A glimpse was enough to satisfy
and just like that
he is now a 'card', tossed aside
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
my fear
i can't describe the ways i like you, they're buried underneath these years of pride, farce, chance, humanity.I can't get close to you, you're more distant than concept, absolution, certainty. I starve to understand you. I ache when i consider you.Will i quench my desire or will i embrace the potency of fate. My will is to defy. my fear consumes me. the path is always silent, it seems.
Friday, April 24, 2009
She and the Moon
Reflecting light back to the moon
And broadcasting their girlish love
The moon and she
She can be so far away
And hold him with intimacy still
He swells as she swells and wanes as well
With her and only her
Dedicated to two most beautiful people i know.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
this dreams's on me
Future Fiction
you're there with pretty green strings
strung to misfortune and desire,mismatching attire
you smile from across the heaven
and fabricated a feelings's seeds
you lift yourself from the hardness
and your dreadful spiteful deeds
and I whisper to the bartender,
"The next dream's on me"
you stare into your glass
focused on empty lust and greed
scanning down the path
for a young strong worthy steed
but your picture's just the past
and your tears are why you bleed
and as you scrape your dusty pockets
the next dream's on me
and he pours another glass
says, "this one's free"
and your eyes find me finally
and then you see
that your worries are just boundaries
where your mind and spirit meet
and I lift my glass deliberately
"this dream's on me"
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Gazillion Things About Me
This was supposed to be published on my birthday but lazy me kept on postponing it...
i was tagged by Big B to do this gazillion TAg.I have to post like 125 random things about me,so BIG Bro here it is...
i hope u guys don't fall sleep reading (seriously)...
1.I love chocolates
2.i am addicted to my computer
3.Flame shots are my specialty...just give me a bottle of vodka.
4.In school i was as slim as a chopstick.
5.I don't want to die.
6.I am a romantic person and i had it my way i will make sure my special one never forgets our first valentine.
7.I don't believe in true love anymore.
8.ice-creams in winters make me happy.
9.I like to get drenched in rains
10.I am happiest when i am sleeping.
11.I don't like eating out.
12.MMy Mom have been told by 7 astrologers that i will murder some1.I haven't killed anyone...yet.
13.A dog bit me once,when i was picking the ball,I was a kid then.
14.My vision is weak...and i have to wear spects now.I don't like myself.
15.Dream Girl: Suman From Maine Pyaar Kiya.
16.First blogger i met: Mayz.
17.I am scared of driving bikes.Haven't driven one in last 5 years.
18.no problem in adjusting at anyone's place...just show me the bed.
19.I love my biceps.
20.I am an atheist.
21.Can play "sa re ga ma" on Guitar.
22.I have watched REVOLVER over 100 times.
23.My birth-certificate says my name is Vishal ..lol
24.I love to sleep...i can sleep for 12-13 hours on a trot.
25.HAVE YOU EVER:
1. Dated someone twice → No.
2. Been cheated on? → Yes
3. Kissed someone & regretted it? → No.
4. Lost someone special? → Yes
5. Been depressed?→ Yes
6. Been drunk and threw up? → Yes, thrice.
26.HAVE YOU:
1. Made new friends → Yes.Two great ones.
2. Fallen out of love → Yes.
3. Laughed until you cried → yes.
4. Met someone who changed you → yes,a little.
5. Found out who your true friends were → Yes
6. Found out someone was talking about you → Yes
7. Kissed anyone on your friend's list → Nope
8. Made the first Move → No
10. Do you have any pets → No,I had pets when i was a kid.
11. Do you want to change your name → No
12. What did you do for your last birthday → Stayed at home.Had dinner with mom.
13. What time did you wake up today – 8:21 a.m.
14. What were you doing at midnight last night→ chatting with a girl
15. Name something you CANNOT wait for → April 15th
16. Last time you saw your father → 2002
17. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life → more money...
18. Most visited webpage → Gmail, Facebook and Demonoid.
27.ABOUT U:
1. What's your name→ Vikram
2. Nicknames→ vicky,vp and vikku.
3. Height → 5'11”
4. Zodiac sign → Aries
5. Male or female or transgendered → Male
6. Elementary→ Campus School Pantnagar university
7. Schools → Campus School Pantnagar university
8. Colleges → SIMT,Rudrapur
9. Fantasy:to have a house of glass surrounded by jungle,it's raining and i am looking through the glass,a cup of coffee in my hand.
10. Hair color → Black
11. Long or short → short
12. Ever been in love? Yes, once
13. Do you have a crush on someone? → Yes, The current count is 2.
14. Piercings → want one
15. Tattoos → never
16. Righty or lefty → Righty
17. First piercing → Soon
18: First best friends → Sid
19. First sport you joined: Cricket and Chess
20. First pet → Dog named 'Tony'.
21. First vacation → hmmmm...punjab,jalandhar
22. First concert → Never
23. First crush --> Manisha
24. Eating → ? ---------
25. Drinking → Beer in my class 10th holidays.I was in Naini tal with friends.I drank 2 glasses.
27. I'm about to → sleep.
28. I was once inspired my Adolf Hitler.I was in Class 9 then.
29. I love milk.1/2 liter everyday in the giant glass i have.
30. Listening to--> Quit playing games with my heart-BB
31. I don't forgive easily.
31. I don't forget a favor either.
33. I have a little scar on my left temple from an accident.
34. I was in car accident in june 2007,nose broke from 2 places.I don't think i look good anymore.
35.I eat anything that can be eaten by you.I eat good,healthy low-fat food.
36.I am always interested to go 'places'.I am a traveler.
37.I was Mr. Farewell on my graduation day in 2006.
38.I am too attached to my belongings,my shoes,my mobiles etc...
39.I fell in love with a friend.
40.When i get drunk : i chat a lot and eat a lot of chicken
41.Though i have a lot of patience but I hate to wait.
42.I quit smoking but after 6 months started again.
43.I love darkside...so tempting and mysterious.
44.I made my first buck when i was 8 or 9.
45.When i feel lonely i go to sleep.
46.I miss talking to my dad.
47.I don't like to fight.If someone does, i don't spare them.
48.I am shy ,when it comes to talking to girls.
49.Sometimes i weep and weep a lot.
50.I rarely watch Hindi movies.Hollywood is my flavour.
51.I prefer to hit the gym then to go to a pub.
52.I like to shave every 3rd day.
53.My Girl-Friends say i seemed arrogant to them at first.
54.Don't believe in miracles and fate.I look for logical explanations always.
55.My Fav. song is "Come Undone" By Duran Duran
56.I have been hit-on by both sexes.
57.I have watched Whole of Friends Seasons during exam season.
YOUR FUTURE :
58. Want kids? --> No
59. Want to get married ? --> No
60. Careers in mind? --> Taxi driver,Business tycoon
61. In 2006, i gained a lot of muscle and looked my best till now.I miss the me from 2006.
62.Fav actor(Male):Hollywood:- John Trivolta in past, Russell Crowe & Denzel Washington at present.
63.Fav actor(Female):Hollywood:- Meryl Streep & Jodie Foster, Kate Winslet at present.
64.Fav actor(Male):Indian:- Abhay Deol.
65.Fav actor(Female):Indian:- Konkana sen.
66.I don't want to be a Coder.I want to be a manager.
67.I want to learn Kick boxing.
68. Lips or eyes → Eyes
69. Hugs or kisses→ Kisses
70. Shorter or taller → Taller
71. Older or Younger → both
72. Romantic or spontaneous → Spontaneous
73. Nice stomach or nice arms → stomach ...lolz
74. Sensitive or loud → different roles in different places.
75. Hook-up or relationship → relationship
76. Sex on first date → Maybe.
77. Trouble maker or hesitant → Troublemaker
78. Kissed a stranger → Yes, maybe ;D ...ehehee
79. Lost glasses/contacts → Yes Glasses -- many times.
80. Broken someone's heart → Yes.
81. Had your own heart broken → Yes.
82. Been arrested → No
83. Turned someone down → Yes
85. Cried when someone died → Yes
86. Liked a friend that is a girl/boy? → girl yes,i fell in love.
87. Cheated on a friend → Never.
88. Felt Betrayed → yes.Have lost count now.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
89. Yourself → Always,Yes
90. Miracles → Seeing in believing,When i will see one happening only then can i believe.
91. Love at first sight → lolz...never
92. Heaven → No.
93. Santa Clause → No
94. Peace in this lifetime→ No
95. Kissing on the first date? → maybe
96. Angels → No
97. Is there one person you want to be with right now? --> Yes.
98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time in the past? --> No
99. You will die Young→ Yes, I want to die in forties.
100. You will end with the one you love and learn to love the one you are with – yeah why not.
101.I am scared of water.But i want to go river rafting.
102.Would love to have 50 suits and 100 pairs of shoes.
103.If u want me to do something for you...just give me a chocolate bar and ask.
104. Last beverage → Absinthe then Vodka with Limca & Ice.
105. Last phone call--> Ashish Raina,45 minutes ago.
106. Last text message→ yesterday
107. Last song you listened to→ pitbull-KRazy(ft. lil john)
108. Last time you cried→ 2 months ago
110. Last meal: Had Scrambled eggs in lunch
111.I may shift to Toronto,Canada by 2012.
112.My idol: Mahatama Gandhi
113.I want to have a physique like Enrique.That's perfection for me.
114.In my dreams i see myself as a Vampire...
115.I wish i had wings sometimes.
116.MY first prized possession was a little pencil box.
117.I love sunglasses.
118.My juniors called me 'bhokaal style'(awesomeness) in college.
119.I bashed up my senior once in college toilet coz he wanted to screw my friend's sister.I was suspended for 5 days.It was so satisfying.I loved myself for that.
120.I like to say 'issssssssshhh' whenever i forget something.
121.I love the bhokaal(godmax) word and i use it a lot.
122.I want tons n tons of money to spend on my family.
123.If i die i want my body to be sent to ALcor Life Foundation.
124.I hope i get THAT deal that will change my life and all my problems would be solve.
125.I still miss my childhood fights with my sister.
I am not tagging anyone..whosoever wants can tag themselves.
tc ppl
i was tagged by Big B to do this gazillion TAg.I have to post like 125 random things about me,so BIG Bro here it is...
i hope u guys don't fall sleep reading (seriously)...
1.I love chocolates
2.i am addicted to my computer
3.Flame shots are my specialty...just give me a bottle of vodka.
4.In school i was as slim as a chopstick.
5.I don't want to die.
6.I am a romantic person and i had it my way i will make sure my special one never forgets our first valentine.
7.I don't believe in true love anymore.
8.ice-creams in winters make me happy.
9.I like to get drenched in rains
10.I am happiest when i am sleeping.
11.I don't like eating out.
12.MMy Mom have been told by 7 astrologers that i will murder some1.I haven't killed anyone...yet.
13.A dog bit me once,when i was picking the ball,I was a kid then.
14.My vision is weak...and i have to wear spects now.I don't like myself.
15.Dream Girl: Suman From Maine Pyaar Kiya.
16.First blogger i met: Mayz.
17.I am scared of driving bikes.Haven't driven one in last 5 years.
18.no problem in adjusting at anyone's place...just show me the bed.
19.I love my biceps.
20.I am an atheist.
21.Can play "sa re ga ma" on Guitar.
22.I have watched REVOLVER over 100 times.
23.My birth-certificate says my name is Vishal ..lol
24.I love to sleep...i can sleep for 12-13 hours on a trot.
25.HAVE YOU EVER:
1. Dated someone twice → No.
2. Been cheated on? → Yes
3. Kissed someone & regretted it? → No.
4. Lost someone special? → Yes
5. Been depressed?→ Yes
6. Been drunk and threw up? → Yes, thrice.
26.HAVE YOU:
1. Made new friends → Yes.Two great ones.
2. Fallen out of love → Yes.
3. Laughed until you cried → yes.
4. Met someone who changed you → yes,a little.
5. Found out who your true friends were → Yes
6. Found out someone was talking about you → Yes
7. Kissed anyone on your friend's list → Nope
8. Made the first Move → No
10. Do you have any pets → No,I had pets when i was a kid.
11. Do you want to change your name → No
12. What did you do for your last birthday → Stayed at home.Had dinner with mom.
13. What time did you wake up today – 8:21 a.m.
14. What were you doing at midnight last night→ chatting with a girl
15. Name something you CANNOT wait for → April 15th
16. Last time you saw your father → 2002
17. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life → more money...
18. Most visited webpage → Gmail, Facebook and Demonoid.
27.ABOUT U:
1. What's your name→ Vikram
2. Nicknames→ vicky,vp and vikku.
3. Height → 5'11”
4. Zodiac sign → Aries
5. Male or female or transgendered → Male
6. Elementary→ Campus School Pantnagar university
7. Schools → Campus School Pantnagar university
8. Colleges → SIMT,Rudrapur
9. Fantasy:to have a house of glass surrounded by jungle,it's raining and i am looking through the glass,a cup of coffee in my hand.
10. Hair color → Black
11. Long or short → short
12. Ever been in love? Yes, once
13. Do you have a crush on someone? → Yes, The current count is 2.
14. Piercings → want one
15. Tattoos → never
16. Righty or lefty → Righty
17. First piercing → Soon
18: First best friends → Sid
19. First sport you joined: Cricket and Chess
20. First pet → Dog named 'Tony'.
21. First vacation → hmmmm...punjab,jalandhar
22. First concert → Never
23. First crush --> Manisha
24. Eating → ? ---------
25. Drinking → Beer in my class 10th holidays.I was in Naini tal with friends.I drank 2 glasses.
27. I'm about to → sleep.
28. I was once inspired my Adolf Hitler.I was in Class 9 then.
29. I love milk.1/2 liter everyday in the giant glass i have.
30. Listening to--> Quit playing games with my heart-BB
31. I don't forgive easily.
31. I don't forget a favor either.
33. I have a little scar on my left temple from an accident.
34. I was in car accident in june 2007,nose broke from 2 places.I don't think i look good anymore.
35.I eat anything that can be eaten by you.I eat good,healthy low-fat food.
36.I am always interested to go 'places'.I am a traveler.
37.I was Mr. Farewell on my graduation day in 2006.
38.I am too attached to my belongings,my shoes,my mobiles etc...
39.I fell in love with a friend.
40.When i get drunk : i chat a lot and eat a lot of chicken
41.Though i have a lot of patience but I hate to wait.
42.I quit smoking but after 6 months started again.
43.I love darkside...so tempting and mysterious.
44.I made my first buck when i was 8 or 9.
45.When i feel lonely i go to sleep.
46.I miss talking to my dad.
47.I don't like to fight.If someone does, i don't spare them.
48.I am shy ,when it comes to talking to girls.
49.Sometimes i weep and weep a lot.
50.I rarely watch Hindi movies.Hollywood is my flavour.
51.I prefer to hit the gym then to go to a pub.
52.I like to shave every 3rd day.
53.My Girl-Friends say i seemed arrogant to them at first.
54.Don't believe in miracles and fate.I look for logical explanations always.
55.My Fav. song is "Come Undone" By Duran Duran
56.I have been hit-on by both sexes.
57.I have watched Whole of Friends Seasons during exam season.
YOUR FUTURE :
58. Want kids? --> No
59. Want to get married ? --> No
60. Careers in mind? --> Taxi driver,Business tycoon
61. In 2006, i gained a lot of muscle and looked my best till now.I miss the me from 2006.
62.Fav actor(Male):Hollywood:- John Trivolta in past, Russell Crowe & Denzel Washington at present.
63.Fav actor(Female):Hollywood:- Meryl Streep & Jodie Foster, Kate Winslet at present.
64.Fav actor(Male):Indian:- Abhay Deol.
65.Fav actor(Female):Indian:- Konkana sen.
66.I don't want to be a Coder.I want to be a manager.
67.I want to learn Kick boxing.
68. Lips or eyes → Eyes
69. Hugs or kisses→ Kisses
70. Shorter or taller → Taller
71. Older or Younger → both
72. Romantic or spontaneous → Spontaneous
73. Nice stomach or nice arms → stomach ...lolz
74. Sensitive or loud → different roles in different places.
75. Hook-up or relationship → relationship
76. Sex on first date → Maybe.
77. Trouble maker or hesitant → Troublemaker
78. Kissed a stranger → Yes, maybe ;D ...ehehee
79. Lost glasses/contacts → Yes Glasses -- many times.
80. Broken someone's heart → Yes.
81. Had your own heart broken → Yes.
82. Been arrested → No
83. Turned someone down → Yes
85. Cried when someone died → Yes
86. Liked a friend that is a girl/boy? → girl yes,i fell in love.
87. Cheated on a friend → Never.
88. Felt Betrayed → yes.Have lost count now.
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
89. Yourself → Always,Yes
90. Miracles → Seeing in believing,When i will see one happening only then can i believe.
91. Love at first sight → lolz...never
92. Heaven → No.
93. Santa Clause → No
94. Peace in this lifetime→ No
95. Kissing on the first date? → maybe
96. Angels → No
97. Is there one person you want to be with right now? --> Yes.
98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time in the past? --> No
99. You will die Young→ Yes, I want to die in forties.
100. You will end with the one you love and learn to love the one you are with – yeah why not.
101.I am scared of water.But i want to go river rafting.
102.Would love to have 50 suits and 100 pairs of shoes.
103.If u want me to do something for you...just give me a chocolate bar and ask.
104. Last beverage → Absinthe then Vodka with Limca & Ice.
105. Last phone call--> Ashish Raina,45 minutes ago.
106. Last text message→ yesterday
107. Last song you listened to→ pitbull-KRazy(ft. lil john)
108. Last time you cried→ 2 months ago
110. Last meal: Had Scrambled eggs in lunch
111.I may shift to Toronto,Canada by 2012.
112.My idol: Mahatama Gandhi
113.I want to have a physique like Enrique.That's perfection for me.
114.In my dreams i see myself as a Vampire...
115.I wish i had wings sometimes.
116.MY first prized possession was a little pencil box.
117.I love sunglasses.
118.My juniors called me 'bhokaal style'(awesomeness) in college.
119.I bashed up my senior once in college toilet coz he wanted to screw my friend's sister.I was suspended for 5 days.It was so satisfying.I loved myself for that.
120.I like to say 'issssssssshhh' whenever i forget something.
121.I love the bhokaal(godmax) word and i use it a lot.
122.I want tons n tons of money to spend on my family.
123.If i die i want my body to be sent to ALcor Life Foundation.
124.I hope i get THAT deal that will change my life and all my problems would be solve.
125.I still miss my childhood fights with my sister.
I am not tagging anyone..whosoever wants can tag themselves.
tc ppl
Saturday, April 4, 2009
lust
Future fiction
one night in the neverland
two strangers stayed
it was raining
he was cold
she was bewitching
drenched to the core
she wrapped herself in his arms
he wraps himself in lust
the night became their trust
he mumbled,she crumbled
sloshed in temptations
they bit the apple
both played the game
they ravished
they caved
Labels:
future fiction,
lust,
smellofearthafterrain,
vikramparmar
Friday, April 3, 2009
Happy Happy b'day to me N my blog...
Hi ever1,
hard to believe but it's already been a year :D
it has been a journey that i will cherish for ever.I met a lots n lots of gr8 people,who were so kind to me and made me feel loved.You guys were always here for me..not matter how stupid i sounded or how foolish my actions were.
When i look back and see what i was a year ago..i can't believe that i have this attitude now.I am so in love with myself...yes yes yes it's true,i love u but i love me more ;D
There are some special ppl who shaped my life and i can't thank them enough.
This post would not be complete without naming you guys...
my clone,my bro: heymayz,an arian to the core...thanx a ton bro,BTW you were the first one to wish me bearhugs!
...my big B Vee,he's the big b i always missed in my life.Those talks still echo in my mind sometimes beeRhugs bro!
...met sisters,Cindy my biggest critic and fan, thank you sis,your comments are precious to me.
Sameera,sho sweet sis,always scolding me...i miss reading u a lot sis...come back plzzz
phoenix,she's so caring and helpful,always there for you.i still remember those talks with u sis.
runnerfrog, such an intelligent person he is,i just love his artistic works,a rare gem.
Sid,u bro,me n u always argue,making me see the things the way i should see them.i love his poems,so simple so deep.
preeti,whenever someone pushes me into corner,i call her.She's so gr8 with words,she can kiLL ppl with a line.
Joie,such an innocent soul,my future boss,shoo sweet person,Loves 'jalebi'!see u in nov dear;)
Ne,she changed my perception about blondes ;D.Gonna have tequila shots someday girl...thank you for being there and making me laugh.
MysLykesMeeh,she kept me walking in the right direction,giving me confidence to move on.Thank you dear.
chan,party animal to the core,out of the world attitude,& she sleeps like a baby,rest i am still trying to figure out..lol
frenchess i still remember the first time we talked,a cool person and so full of happiness.
Thanx to all who ever visited me...forgive me if i forget your name...still under the influence of green fairy...
i have to tell you all about my b'day ,i will- in coming posts...also there was a tag that i was supposed to do today,but i am really busy...so i will make sure i post a gazillion things about me next time.
tc ppl
and you stalkers i will catch ya soon... ;D
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